His lordship snuffy would like to tell his 2 whole readers that he is not on the down and out, he was merley sick. Im too shit faced at the moment to intelligibly write right now, but if I dont write something I would be a bastard ass hole face, and possibly a bag head.....I love you all!
P.S. your all way better at this shit than meeeee!!!
Saturday, February 21, 2009
Friday, February 13, 2009
As for me, I hocked my brains packed my bags and headed west
So after needing to recover from the disgusting feeling in my stomach after such a blog post filled with this HOPE garbage, His Majesty Lord Snuffy decided it was time to act like a hermit!
So with his meager 120 dollars to my lowly Irish name, I decided it was time to go west! I took a trip to some of my favorite West Texas towns.
I started here in San Antonio, and just got in the Chariot er... piece of shit mustang....and didn't stop till I realised I almost fucked myself. You see folks, If your going to drive through the empty expanse, its best to look at your gas gauge. If its at 1/4 tank, its best to buy Dino fuel before your stopped 15 miles from the nearest town....Lucky for my lazy ass, there was no WALKING to be done as there was a hole in the wall gas station right outside of Hondo. So after a quick fill and a 2 liter soda, it was time to go. An hour and a half later, I was In Del Rio!!! I love this place. It has Muy Bueno Don Mocilinos Mexican Restaurant, and there tasty fajitas!!! And it has Lake Amistad! An awsome place to go to fish. but with no fishing gear I thought hey, Ill just walk the dam. No prob right? Wrong. I get to the entrance of the fucking dam and its closed! Then much to my disgust I hear these fucking hecklers cussing me in Spanish. Not one known for a temper, I tried to shrug it off. But these fucking morons actually tried to tell me to give them a ride. Fuck you is my obvious answer to the short little faggots who looked as though a shower hasn't had their company in 3 or 4 days.
Now I don't carry, but this is Texas, and I do conceal on trips in my car. And when my friends decided to not take my hint, they wound up face to face with 38 special. I will never understand why people insist on trying to fuck with someone who is inside their car, especially in this gun happy state. But after a very pissy remark about being white trash scum, the obviously least drunk individual decided that my pea shooter was indeed enough to kill someone dead, and beckoned the other fools to leave me be. A very fortunate set of circumstances, couse I have enough on my conscious.
So from Del Rio it was off to Odessa and the sea of brown. I hate the desert. Not dislike, not don't care for, I fucking hate it. Which is exactly why I went. I needed to remind myself that while I am really pissed over the way things are going, I could always live in this piss hole. In fact this expensive 7 hour reminder is so overwhelmingly effective that I left an hour after I arrived. The sun was up, and I haven't slept yet. I haul ass past Midland to the Hwy 87 south exit and booked for San Angelo. While not the most amazing city known to man, San Angelo has a homey feel to it that just welcomes you to it. I stoped at one of the Local joints, had a chicken fried steak which was larger than the plate it came on and less than 7 bucks. Went into the parking lot and slept for around 4 hours. After my nice nap, I was feeling really crusty. So I turned on the AC headed for I 10 and home. after a beautifully scenic drive in the hill country I find myself on the outskirts of town, and what do I see?? The most hated day of the year. Valentines day. Just when I was starting to feel better, I get to see these sick pictures of people happily in love, not at all like myself and I wonder. Will I ever get to see what these jack asses in the pictures feel? Meh, why bother, i decided, and so I made this lousy ass attempt to make a post. If you made it this far, thanks for coming along for the ride, but my best friend just gave me a bottle of moon shine, and I got so memories to drown. Till next time.
So with his meager 120 dollars to my lowly Irish name, I decided it was time to go west! I took a trip to some of my favorite West Texas towns.
I started here in San Antonio, and just got in the Chariot er... piece of shit mustang....and didn't stop till I realised I almost fucked myself. You see folks, If your going to drive through the empty expanse, its best to look at your gas gauge. If its at 1/4 tank, its best to buy Dino fuel before your stopped 15 miles from the nearest town....Lucky for my lazy ass, there was no WALKING to be done as there was a hole in the wall gas station right outside of Hondo. So after a quick fill and a 2 liter soda, it was time to go. An hour and a half later, I was In Del Rio!!! I love this place. It has Muy Bueno Don Mocilinos Mexican Restaurant, and there tasty fajitas!!! And it has Lake Amistad! An awsome place to go to fish. but with no fishing gear I thought hey, Ill just walk the dam. No prob right? Wrong. I get to the entrance of the fucking dam and its closed! Then much to my disgust I hear these fucking hecklers cussing me in Spanish. Not one known for a temper, I tried to shrug it off. But these fucking morons actually tried to tell me to give them a ride. Fuck you is my obvious answer to the short little faggots who looked as though a shower hasn't had their company in 3 or 4 days.
Now I don't carry, but this is Texas, and I do conceal on trips in my car. And when my friends decided to not take my hint, they wound up face to face with 38 special. I will never understand why people insist on trying to fuck with someone who is inside their car, especially in this gun happy state. But after a very pissy remark about being white trash scum, the obviously least drunk individual decided that my pea shooter was indeed enough to kill someone dead, and beckoned the other fools to leave me be. A very fortunate set of circumstances, couse I have enough on my conscious.
So from Del Rio it was off to Odessa and the sea of brown. I hate the desert. Not dislike, not don't care for, I fucking hate it. Which is exactly why I went. I needed to remind myself that while I am really pissed over the way things are going, I could always live in this piss hole. In fact this expensive 7 hour reminder is so overwhelmingly effective that I left an hour after I arrived. The sun was up, and I haven't slept yet. I haul ass past Midland to the Hwy 87 south exit and booked for San Angelo. While not the most amazing city known to man, San Angelo has a homey feel to it that just welcomes you to it. I stoped at one of the Local joints, had a chicken fried steak which was larger than the plate it came on and less than 7 bucks. Went into the parking lot and slept for around 4 hours. After my nice nap, I was feeling really crusty. So I turned on the AC headed for I 10 and home. after a beautifully scenic drive in the hill country I find myself on the outskirts of town, and what do I see?? The most hated day of the year. Valentines day. Just when I was starting to feel better, I get to see these sick pictures of people happily in love, not at all like myself and I wonder. Will I ever get to see what these jack asses in the pictures feel? Meh, why bother, i decided, and so I made this lousy ass attempt to make a post. If you made it this far, thanks for coming along for the ride, but my best friend just gave me a bottle of moon shine, and I got so memories to drown. Till next time.
Saturday, February 7, 2009
Suck and Fail.
Simple enough to wrap your mind around. Take your typical burned out vet. Give him a few years to try and get over the mental reality of life after war. Have him try out for the police dept. Watch him sweat with worry as he tries to not psyc himself out. Wondering if he is going to hurt something and have to go back into that goddamned wheelchair.
1st event. Passed...look at him, confused as he has'nt done shit in 4 years.
2nd event. Hold on...how did these guys who are in increadible looking shape fail, and his fat ass pass??
3rd and final event. After scratching the back of his head raw from disbelief that he is still here when the supermen he thought he had no chance against were all but gone. Look at him run, he looks funny all tired and sweaty. Did he actualy finish the run? What the hell, people are walking behind him. wait they are yelling at him to hurry. The back of his fat theighs burning, arms like spaghetti, lings about to explode. The irony taste of blood in his mouth. But wait,..thats not blood. Thats the failure coursing through his veins. Like ice water that just ruined his wonderful day in paradise. 28 seconds too late. Its what he gets for having a hope. Hope floats just like fish crap in a dirty lake. Mabee next time he will actually prepare. That new gym membership better be worth it becouse it sure as hell is expensive. But at least he finished the damn thing. Unlike the cowards that looked so wonderful, and gave up. Guess he still has a little grit after all. Its sure good to be alive.
1st event. Passed...look at him, confused as he has'nt done shit in 4 years.
2nd event. Hold on...how did these guys who are in increadible looking shape fail, and his fat ass pass??
3rd and final event. After scratching the back of his head raw from disbelief that he is still here when the supermen he thought he had no chance against were all but gone. Look at him run, he looks funny all tired and sweaty. Did he actualy finish the run? What the hell, people are walking behind him. wait they are yelling at him to hurry. The back of his fat theighs burning, arms like spaghetti, lings about to explode. The irony taste of blood in his mouth. But wait,..thats not blood. Thats the failure coursing through his veins. Like ice water that just ruined his wonderful day in paradise. 28 seconds too late. Its what he gets for having a hope. Hope floats just like fish crap in a dirty lake. Mabee next time he will actually prepare. That new gym membership better be worth it becouse it sure as hell is expensive. But at least he finished the damn thing. Unlike the cowards that looked so wonderful, and gave up. Guess he still has a little grit after all. Its sure good to be alive.
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